Ho, hum. Here I am... merely strolling on the side of the street (no sidewalk to behold) enjoying a snow cone with a close pal. Hmm, what a nice evening to meander down the-
BLAAANNGGGHHHHHH!!!
Someone just lost their shit.
I bet you can guess who it is. Yep. Asshole Douche. So we meet again!
"Are you really that stupid?!"
Cool those jets, friend. I was probably "in your way" all of two seconds. No need to honk that horn and launch your head out the window to casually abuse me. And from the looks of you, gotta be pushing what, 50? 60? Curmudgeon. Lemme just run this by you... before you waste your wheezy air bellowing insults at two teenaged ladies, pick up one of those handy Rules of the Road pamphlets they've got down at the DMV. It should mention something about "pedestrians" and "right of way" but I'll leave that up to you to discover. Though I should point out that most pedestrians are in fact assholes, I must argue that I'm on a road that more resembles a parking lot than an actual street that cars barrel down on.
Besides, in a few short years you will know how it feels to be honked at on the road, in or out of the car. Because let's face it. Old people (you) are slow, partially deaf (fully deaf?) and partially blind (fully blind?). I'm looking forward to the day when your license is taken away for running down hippies at a farmer's market. Then we shall see who has the upper hand!
Best wishes.
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