You just sealed the deal

Well aren't you an adonis to behold.

I literally spotted you a mile away. Saw you jogging from beyond the hazy heat waves and thought, I know this guy. Ya know how sometimes you might think "I bet that's...." when you see a person approaching. The thing is it was your douchiness that alerted me to your true identity. I sensed it before I even saw your face. That's saying something. Showin off those pecs like nobody's business. The ones that you seem to be cultivating into "male boobage" status.

With the risk of compromising anominity, I'm afraid your name bothers me too. I won't say what it is since word could get out that you've been written about because, well, everyone reads this blog. Let's just say it rhymes with "omen." Fitting. And it could describe a citizen of a certain city in a boot-shaped country. Like a cowboy boot.

Not that I wasn't sure of it before, but bad news is I now have an airtight case against you, D. Better luck next time. I mean, this whole "see ya, shirt!" craze is getting out of hand.